You never know how long your rope is until you reach the end

UPDATE:  MacKenzie said that at least I’d get some funny stories out of the experience.  In the short time I’ve been on, I’ve found two important things:  1.  Some women think guys are pretty stupid, and 2.  I’m a 0% match with a box of milk duds:

The #1 part comes in where a significant number of women on this site say that they’re 24 and then post pictures of women who are clearly in their 50’s 60’s or 70’s.  Either they think men aren’t going to notice that they’re 40 years older than their profile says they are or they’re pretty damn confused about how to specify their age.  Either way, it’s pretty discouraging.

The #2 part comes in with my “quick matches,” most of whom are under 40% match for me (and most of whom happen to be 500lb Aunt Jemima lookalikes.)  But there was an interesting profile on there this morning:

A box of Milk Duds

A box of Milk Duds

Seriously – WTF?  I don’t even like Milk Duds!  And why is a 0% match showing up in my “quick matches” anyway???  I’m beginning to think that this site is a big stealth parody of single people.

Yeah.  So I decided this afternoon that, even though the very notion of such a thing was absurd to me just Thursday evening, it would be in my best interests to join an online dating service.

Yes, I still find it creepy and bizarre.  No I haven’t seen anything even remotely promising and a lot that’s extremely disturbing.  According to them, this is my dating decision flowchart.  I can’t say I agree with it that much.

So yeah.  I’ve taken the next step down the loser ladder.  I went from being a desperate, dateless, pathetic loser to being a desperate, dateless, pathetic loser who’s so desperate and pathetic that he signed up for an online dating service.

(Heh – the keywords script pulled out “desperate” as the most representative word for this article.)


  1. #1 by Joshua on December 27, 2010 - 5:28 PM

    OkCupid says I need to be more intimate with myself. I’m quite happy with that and I don’t need any help, thanks.

    • #2 by Chadwick on December 28, 2010 - 10:16 AM

      Well is that intimate on an emotional level, or intimate in a physical sense?

      • #3 by Joshua on December 28, 2010 - 10:22 AM

        Did you take the quiz? The context is obvious from the title.

  2. #7 by Joshua on December 27, 2010 - 6:16 PM

    Given the descriptions, I’d probably agree with the color test result of blue.

  3. #8 by Dan on January 1, 2011 - 8:31 PM

    Hey, what font are you using on that terminal of yours so it looks like an old XT screen? Cool! =)

    • #9 by Joshua on January 2, 2011 - 9:11 AM

      It’s called GlassTTY VT220. I use it at 20 pt. It looks best if you use the old amber or green phosphor for font colors on a black or dark amber/green background. And size the terminal window to 80×20 or 80×24.

      You can get the font here:

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