The new sports drink for the less than tolerant

A 419 I got in the inbox today:

Hello dear,

My name is Frank Shihwameni from Namibia adopted son of Late Mr. Shihwameni Shiimi Selma residing in Ivory Coast. Please I need your assistance to secure my inheritance which I inherited from him being the sum of $ 9,200,000.00 (Nine Million, Two Hundred Thousand United States
Dollars) which he willed to me before his death as his adopted son.

Well,I am cocntacting you because I want you to stand or me and provide an account where to transfer this fund and to invest it for me in your country while I further my education when I join you. I take this step because the widow of Late Mr. Shihwameni Shiimi Selma who is my oster mother is not happy about the money I inherited from the family due to religious differences. Even before the death of my foster father Late Mr. Shihwameni Shiimi Selma, he realised the haterade the wife had on me, so he made the deposit with a condition that a foreign guardian/partner would stand in for me before the money could be realeased to me. It is because this condition of deposit as stated in the will that made me to contact you with the hope and confidence that you will assist me.

If you are indeed touhed to assist me, kindly get back to me immediately via my personal email adress for more details. Email: (frank200006@yahoo.com)

I ernestly anticipate your response!

Regards,
Frank Shihwameni.

That gave me an idea for a new hate-filled sports drink:

Haterade

Haterade

Too bad a million other people beat me to the synthetic-sugared punch.

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