Black Lagoon Awesome, but Silly Theme Song, Says Local Man

On Chad’s advice, I’ve been watching the anime Black Lagoon, which is about modern day pirates in the South China Sea, and it’s full of sexy awesome. If you’re looking for a good show largely free of the medium’s typical blunders, I highly recommend it. I expect that fans of Cowboy Bebop and Darker Than Black will particularly enjoy it. Like most anime, however, the theme song for the opening credits is absolutely ridiculous and has nothing to do with anything.

Here is the full version of the song, a patchwork of random lyrics and violent/sexual imagery:

I have a big gun
I took it from my Lord
Sick with Justice
I just wanna feel you

I’m your angel
Only a ring away
You make me violate you
No matter who you are

It’s all up to you
No one lives forever

Been burn in the hell
By all those pigs out there

It’s always been hell
From when I was born

They make me violate them
No matter who they are

Get down on your knees
Get a good head on your shoulders
If it’s for your guys
Go to the end of the earth
Do what you think
Give it with dedication
I’ll put out your misery

Have no prayer
So, I keep the gun with me

For my safety
I’ll do it with no sweat

They mean business
No time for sissy pig

Queen of ocean
Sing “the Volga” to you

No need to think about it
You do it or you die

THose aren’t tears
Don’t let it trick on you
I am hard as steel
Get out of my way

Pay back all at once
Suck away the tender part

You made a mess
For Christ sake, this rotten world
Shit out of luck
Go with my vision
Light up the fire
Right on the power
Weapon… I have it all

Get down on your knees
Get a good head on your shoulders
If it’s for your guys
Go to the end of the earth
Do what you think
Give it with dedication
I’ll put out your misery

You made a mess
For Christ sake, this rotten world
Shit out of luck
Go with my vision
Light up the fire
Right on the power
Weapon… I have it all

Video Here

Very silly. Now, here’s the same thing when put through Yahoo! Babel Fish from English to Japanese and back. I think you’ll find that it makes much more sense:

As for me who have the gun which is large to me as for sick person me who have the justice which takes that from my main thing as for me we would like to feel exactly, it is your angel, just the ring which leaves there being whoever whom you have me violate, because as for, that the burning mark of the hell where everyone is a life permanently is everything as for that the hell always it is to you with all those covers over there when I am born, some those which you make violate to those in me the knee [ma] [zu] do to your knee to come being, for your person the head where your shoulder is good profit do those the earthDo to go to the edge do to do those which are thought give that of 献 presenting I your misery, with the praying which is turned off it is not good, therefore, as for me for my safety which maintains the gun where I have been attached as for me the sweat is not with as for those which do that business is meant to be, without the lottery time for the cover it is not queen ” of the ocean; Sing; Volga” In you there is no necessity which is thought concerning that in order to die that or as for those which do you that it is not damage with you does not have to note because the trick it does not do, I do to come out of hard my method suddenly do to pay the soft part do to inhale because of Christ’s is confused, this from luck am my range of vision which said every [wa] do the world where it rots to go do to attach correct the fire by power as a steel iron weapon… That does to your knee which is to come entirely the knee [ma] [zu] in me for your person, profit do the head where your shoulder is good do to go to the edge of the earth do to do those which are thought that of 献 presenting do to give I your misery because of Christ’s does the confusion which is turned off, this from luck it is my range of vision which said every [wa] do the world where it rots to go do to attach correct the fire by power weapon… Entirely it is that in me

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  1. #1 by ottomadenedamotto on July 5, 2010 - 2:57 PM

    After posting this, I read Chad’s Bad Translator post, so here’s something from there:

    Original text:

    “I have a big gun I took it from my Lord Sick with Justice I just wanna feel you”

    …56 translations later we get:

    “I almost feel like such a cruel weapon.”

    Original text:

    “I’m your angel Only a ring away You make me violate you No matter who you are”

    …57 translations later we get:

    “Angel, call your”

    Original text:

    “It’s all up to you No one lives forever”

    …56 translations later we get:

    “Life is hard.”

  2. #2 by Chadwick on July 5, 2010 - 4:40 PM

    The words may be silly, but I fucking love the theme song. I’ve got it and a couple remixes as well as the instrumental version in my regular playlist.

  3. #3 by Erin on July 13, 2010 - 10:43 PM

    Black Lagoon has the most creative cursing I’ve ever heard. That’s what I most remember of the show. That and the awesome (yet silly) theme song.

  4. #4 by stray on May 6, 2011 - 11:04 PM

    yeah but when you listen to the theme carfully it’s based on revy’s past. think about it, i can’t post any lyrics to show you because i’m using my phone for this but when it says “i have big gun i took it from my lord” i think it’s suposed to mean she stole a gun from her father or the guy who held her there and then when it says “they make me violate them no matter who they are” i think it means that she was forced to do things to other people, but thats just my opinion, if you listen to the whole song and try to connect it, it doesn’t seem as silly as you think, it’s more like a story, but again thats my opinion and thats how i like to think about it.

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