Bad Translator

I think by this point in our lives, all of us (or near enough to) have, at some point or another, played around with the automatic translation services to get something interesting/funny/bizarre.  It’s usually good fun.  Today, I stumbled on a new tool to help with that:  Bad Translator.

Bad Translator takes your words, and translates them  through a variety of languages for you (10, 25, or 54 steps) and spits out results that are often more interesting than other tools such as Translation Party (which, rather than seeking  the most humorous results seek the equilibrium point at which a phrase translates in a technical sense back and forth between English and Japanese unaltered—an interesting function all its own).

The example they give is a translation of a line from a Lady Gaga Song:

Original, from Lady Gaga’s Bad Romance: “You and me put on a bad romance”
54 Translations later: “I love you?”

I played with it a little, and got some fairly Zen answers (“All your base are belong to us” became “Construction”).  But I thought by far the most interesting came when I stumbled to, and pulled out the second sentence of their article, Political Cyberscapes I: Democracies and Dictators.

Original text:

“In an attempt to achieve the hat trick of talking about things best avoided at the dinner table, we’ve turned our (short term) attention to mapping a series of references to a range of political terms.”

…54 translations later we get:

“Management company or another group (see above, if any) – are working to improve the situation.”

Obviously, the entire original meaning has more or less been lost here.  But I was actually rather intrigued that it spit out a fairly coherent bit of corporatese.  Anyway, if you want a bit of fun, go play with it.



  1. #1 by Joshua on April 1, 2010 - 7:07 AM

    LOL just awesome!

  2. #2 by Joshua on April 1, 2010 - 7:13 AM

    My favorite translation fodder is articles from The Onion. Wayyy back in high school (1999-2003) my friends and I used to round-trip stuff by hand through Babelfish (then run by AltaVista). Babelfish used SysTran 5 at the time and it produced positively hilarious results. The best one ever was “Orgy a Logistical Nightmare.” Runner up went to “God Angrily Clarifies Don’t Kill Rule.”

    Here’s some for old-times’ sake:

    Original text:

    “WASHINGTON—In an effort to reduce wasteful spending and eliminate non-vital federal services, the U.S. government announced plans this week to cut its long-standing senator program, a move it says will help save more than $300 billion each year.”

    …54 translations later we get:

    “Washington is a member servikos Microns hoverno desempenhar week senate to avoid significant anuais published by Pimm 30 milhoes pagamento information for free.”

    • #3 by Joshua on April 1, 2010 - 7:15 AM

      “Canton, Ohio, although his future sexual freedom, basic first carnival organizers Belsner Jerry, 33, scheduling nightmare Happy Mondays recognize behavior.”

      Very close to what it was back in 2002.

      • #4 by Joshua on April 1, 2010 - 7:23 AM

        “”This is my stupid part,” he said. “Mexican food is very good explosion: Nobody likes genital sauce, but it will happen, urged the two nude photos photoshopping hat night.,”

        ROFL. Seriously.

  3. #5 by Joshua on June 11, 2010 - 9:35 AM

    “A cookie is just a cookie but Newtons are fruit and cake!” -> “Biscuits aside, but the results of Newton and candy!”

  4. #6 by Joshua on June 11, 2010 - 9:36 AM

    LOL “That’s a fine kettle of fish.” -> “This is gay.” It went to hell at BELARUSIAN : Гэта вясёленькая.

  5. #7 by Joshua on June 11, 2010 - 10:07 AM

    The Ten Commandments of Bad Translation:

    • “Turkey, for me, the servant of God.”
    • “I am interested in God.”
    • “Ttangeulgva air and water here and there, and pop.”
    • “God, I thank God for the pool of children, support parents and amusement tax for the third Wednesday of the soul.”
    • “I know thousands of people.”
    • “The official name of God, God Sanctions for Crimes.”
    • “Events in the hague on Sabbath, God.”
    • “Working six days.”
    • “But on Saturday, the seventh day God my son or your daughter, or slaves at the bottom”
    • “Where and find articles with God, and God bless the day in the airport.”
    • “Tipperari father and mother in the goodness of God, my God, I think, xi ‘an.”
    • “This is not a murderer.”
    • “I have a problem.”
    • “In addition to theft.”
    • “I will not be a bad neighbor.”
    • “Women need not be neighbors. Women fear neighbors or local authorities, and release.”
  6. #8 by Joshua on June 11, 2010 - 10:10 AM

    “Warning: DO not leave pumps unattended. You are responsible for spills.” -> “: A bomb here Unstable.”

  7. #9 by Joshua on June 11, 2010 - 10:13 AM

    “Albert Einstein, the genius physicist whose theories changed our ideas of how the universe works, died 55 years ago, on April 18, 1955, of heart failure. He was 76. His funeral and cremation were intensely private affairs” ->

    “Albert, physical changes, and death in 1955 18:04 76 West to 1955, heart attacks and Deaths in the official theory of the world’s oil.”

  8. #10 by Joshua on June 11, 2010 - 10:22 AM

    “A few weeks ago, I was walking through a wood in the English countryside when I heard the unmistakable call of the cuckoo. For some reason, it caused me to fall into a reverie, and as I walked, I began to meditate on that iconic bird” ->

    “Several weeks ago, the demand for eggs in the UK and hear my Cowardly flight is unique and I think that Magnesium”

  9. #11 by Joshua on June 11, 2010 - 10:27 AM

    “If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down? We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason.” ” ->

    “Plants like crying? Free and cry. “”

  10. #12 by Joshua on June 11, 2010 - 10:29 AM

    “Is there anything more beautiful than a beautiful, beautiful flamingo, flying across in front of a beautiful sunset? And he’s carrying a beautiful rose in his beak, and also he’s carrying a very beautiful painting with his feet. And also, you’re drunk.” ->

    “Flanders is good, very good, but in the mouth and lips red as a good idea. Even funeral”

  11. #13 by Joshua on June 11, 2010 - 10:31 AM

    “Whenever I see an old lady slip and fall on a wet sidewalk, my first instinct is to laugh. But then I think, what if I was an ant and she fell on me. Then it wouldn’t seem quite so funny. ” ->

    “Albania against Apple, unless you know a woman with a smile, to see the light compared with the more interesting.”

  12. #14 by Joshua on June 11, 2010 - 10:34 AM

    “Maybe in order to understand mankind we have to look at that word itself. MANKIND. Basically, it’s made up of two separate words “mank” and “ind.” What do these words mean? It’s a mystery and that’s why so is mankind. ” ->

    “Perhaps the best way to hope that both reports from the right, “time” Manhattan “and” This is great. The fact that the human brain.”

  13. #15 by Joshua on July 15, 2010 - 2:47 PM

    Uhh… Why are we suddenly getting Google ads instead of related article links?

    • #16 by Chadwick on July 15, 2010 - 10:43 PM

      Dunno. I’m not getting them.

      • #17 by Joshua on July 16, 2010 - 11:35 AM

        Neither am I now. Weird.

  14. #18 by Joshua on July 15, 2010 - 3:09 PM

    After working at it all day in Babelfish, I managed to recreate something close to the 2002 “Orgy a Logistical Nightmare” travesty:

    In spite even in that excitation concerning the thing next characteristic free participation where the fact that it is possible and plans thing directly is the unpleasant impression of symbolic logic OH Canton, [oruganaizajieri] Belsner of the 1st celebration noise which Monday is approved, 33. The latent authorized personnel expand the ImageBelsner call. ” What kind of I’ You do not know whether; Has met with here several weeks ve ” which; You called Belsner. ” Everything which can not go perhaps well has. But I’ M where it is still decided in order to do the celebration noise which is best to this. If I have lived in order to look at that, the is.” Belsner after he starts planning the celebration noise, complication April 26th being planned at that house, meant that it starts directly. ” I’ m celebration it makes a noise, exactly the ‘ Naïve which is not sufficient you think; ‘ It happens; So, I to call, ” It started doing; You called Belsner. ” When thing my by my it has been about probably to take the collision where my bill tray is principal, I necessity it is light the food and the alcoholic drinks, the handcuff, the condom and the smooth oil, the video of porno, starting considering us with the bead all raw materials of the anus, you will insert the electric battery for [baibureta] all costs you tried to cover clearly N sliding that has become but. So, cash.” where now I pursue everyone, am small; The fact that those are obtained in order to participate must be tried; Belsner’ Large number; The headache of s must accommodate of the authorized personnel the taste of various characteristics widely, it occurred from the difficulty. ” Run D doesn’ Because as for t he those finds the fact that it is confused, pornos ” which plays; You think that we want; You called Belsner. ” But as for filling him can’ You say; Without one you obtain t eagerly. Therefore do I 2 rooms, possess 1 and the 1 of pornos outside? Furthermore and [karen] Marc while thinking, that we want just child or softcore of the children of the woman, real you celebrate and make a noise and you think that we want the pornography of theme. When all bundle of the room which differs to me, it expands thin everyone excessively, it’ May be; As for ll 1 large fuckfest.” Exactly wind the bundle of another 2 and on 3 methods in substituting; Belsner which is continuous: ” I intended probably to put in place the waterproof seat of 1 rooms therefore as for the people without damaging my rag, it is possible to point to the oil mutually. But do I put the waterproof seat on the pornography room or other ones? Group characteristic why very must be complicated? ” One aspect of modification of the regret of Belsner of the celebration noise is subject. First being increased by candidacy because it is occurrence of the Roman toga, it to be possible, as for thing in the Mexican subject Belsner’ It converted because it makes be satisfied; Worship ones of s for the woman whom [sonburero] exposes. ” As for that my ” It was foolish; He said. ” The Mexican food isn’ Good t really for the celebration noise: Who someone’ We would like to lick [sarusa], from separated; privates of s. But I’ d in invitation already two [sonburero] of night Photoshopping, so in naked image me can’ You used; As for t now.” It cancels; The plan of ImageOrgy, you must do, expands the list of the thing another complication to be directly possible, the toy of the adult is chosen especially. ” As for me I’ It calculated; In d dildos and ” of [baibureta] which is; There is a small amount of the leather string; You called Belsner. ” I’ The possible way when in the same way many being pleasant, but in d like the people who are passed there is just a scarf of a handful of silk for the bat plug of light restraint and one vibration in me. Do I ask in order to come having their itself raw materials in the people? I’ As for d on the other hand guest it’ It appears, has sexual intercourse and receives exactly; d is splendid with the toy which it should cross. Perhaps, I shake the butterfly sexual intercourse which the place leases, and piñata.” The way one is decorated, it is possible to find; But already ” The method ” of being put emphasis; Belsner when day of celebration noise gets near, when he increases simultaneously, meant that level of that worry expects. ” I don’ As for t I’ You have known; Finding the time when it makes everything clean, sets m ” which goes; You called Belsner. ” My chief asked in order to go to Columbus for meeting Wednesday in me. It should call to him no ‘ where am I who have been done; Regrettable, as for me prepare’ It possesses the celebration noise; ? This everything being begun, [toni] [Rusan] and Nate [Farris] they’ When saying; The help of d, but those haven’ I’ which excludes it is every [wa] of the jack which is done by t; The cheap characteristic doll is obtained; myself.” You must blast, m where perhaps it goes; Another worry which grows is ratio of the man and woman. As for the celebration noise as for Belsner you call to the person, heavily, presently turn aside. ” Ideal, as for me all people, ” You thought that we want the girl 2 of for the sake of; You called Belsner. ” As for that Imadate simultaneously, I’ The way it is visible; If as for ll as for me the girl 1 for in every 2 people is, it is fortunate. I’ of response of affirmation; ve obtained 10 and 4 women. And as for two of those 4 women they’ You said; As for d ratio of man and woman doesn’ Just at the time of 50/50 that it comes; Truth the glance of t which seems. If just 2 women appear, that’ The celebration which s is not to make a noise, that’ s.a gangbang.” Belsner that local newspaper’ However the fact that the recruiting announcement which pursues the authorized personnel of the celebration noise of the female is taken was considered; ” of s; Lifestyles” which becomes substituting; Section, as for him ” It characterized that as; Last expedient. ” ” Exactly don’ As for t announcement comes accompanying some kind of people, ” You have known; You called Belsner. ” I’ d to store somewhat and exactly be small, intimate that. As for this my first celebration noise and I’ So it is; Actually that way where there are people where d I have known. Or at least the friend of the friend. I’ Rejoicing, in order to come accompanying the woman, but ve which you have asked to the person I perhaps shouldn’ it.” The calculation of t; Belsner’ where art Schonbrod, [suuinga] and the author who are observed wobble said, locally; You think entirely; The frustration of s is common between the organizers of the 1st celebration noise. ” Most beginners enter in order to discover exactly or, in plan of which rank celebration noise, ” You are surprised; You called Schonbrod. ” To music from, that to the support inducement list is full very in tension. But the plan person finally, must remember that those raw materials entirely are around. Important matter has celebrated the combination of the friend and the acquaintance of the wild night of many characteristic national assemblies. [Belsner] That prospect and doesn’ If it maintains; As for t these quarrels all him, he’ It tried to obtain; In ll years.” There is the celebration noise which it should remember for the sake of; ” I’ m secure it’ One time which solves ll entirely, well as for that everyone it is splendid, ” You pass; Belsner which uses the telephone on the Mexican restaurant in order to ask and concerning the price of [keitaringu] was said. ” In regard to me, I’ Exactly ll the happy time it’ So it is; s over.”

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