I was trying to think of the brand name of those guaifenesin tablets. The word I wanted was “Mucinex.” What kept popping into my head was “Cuisinart.” Aren’t words fun? “Take a Cuisinart to clear up chest congestion!” I bet that exposing your bronchial tubage directly to a Cuisinart would likely clear up congestion pretty quickly. Small matter that your entire respiratory tract would subsequently resemble sangria. 🙂
I’d just hate for you to be in the shower one day when out of the shadows steps a man with a smuggled-in molecular destabilizer, and ZAP! What was once your penis is now a tasteful reproduction of a coffee table by Herman Miller.